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Section 6.3

Overloaded Sentences

Avoid sentences that contain more information than the reader can easily follow. Instead, divide such sentences into more manageable pieces that can be easilygrasped.


Weak

Because researchers interested in speech synthesis and automaticrecognition need to find rules that improve intelligibility of speech, they needto study the psychological determinants more closely before they can solve whathas become a complex set of questions.

Improved

Researchers interested in speech synthesis and automatic recognition needto find rules that improve intelligibility of speech. Consequently, they needto study the psychological determinants more closely before they can solve whathas become a complex set of questions.

Weak

In response to the leak history of the pipe made of 304-L stainless steel,a work request, IJ-117, was prepared by Plant Maintenance in August of 1989 toreplace approximately 55 feet of the HLD 304-L pipe--the entire segment runningfrom the "cells" area to the point in the drainage system that turns south toexit the building--with pipe made of a different material, Iconel 600 (see FigureN).

Improved

Plant Maintenance responded to the leak history of the stainless steel pipe(304-L) with a work request in August 1989 to replace a 55-foot section withIconel 600 pipe. This section made up the entire pipe segment running from the"cells" area to a point where the drainage system turns south to exit thebuilding (see Figure N).


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## Overloaded Sentences ##
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